Just some things I've learned from Niamh's Leaving do

  1. Drinking beer and then progressing to captain morgan and coke will make you dee-runk. Fact. Adding Jagerbombs to this, will make you invincible. Just saying.
  2. You can be uninvited to your friends celebrity house warming party. All you have to do is continue to refer to it as a "celebrity house warming" and threaten to turn up in a "I heart _____ (insert any celebrity name here)" t-shirt with potential tattoos of the same nature in inappropriate places.
  3. If you've spent all your money on alcohol and haven't any to get home, never worry. You can pay for the taxi home with an umbrella. Just keep insisting and then exit rapidly leaving all inside utterly confused. And yourself one umbrella down.
  4. Even though you think you're hilarious on the night, the cold sober light of morning soon makes you realise otherwise.

No comments: